Youth information portal Teeviit interviewed Triinu Pääsik to discuss the topics of personal growth and development among the youth.
Which accounts do you recommend young people follow on social media and why?
I recommend you follow accounts whose content makes you feel good and interests you. Everything else that causes you to feel envy or makes you doubt yourself should be unfollowed.
Social media algorithms show us content similar to what we have already consumed, it is thus worth reviewing whether the content on your feed actually makes you feel good or not. Sometimes it may be necessary to remove your friend’s content from your feed, in this case, instead of unfollowing them you can just hide their posts from your feed. Only you can take care of yourself!
What is it that you do, and do you have any tips for self-motivation?
I am a proud former teacher and educational technologist but have now taken a step forward in my career. Teaching does not have to be your first, last or only career choice, but it is an excellent platform for self-improvement thanks to its many opportunities. I also recently had a son and am now a new mother of two. In addition, I have experience as a junior researcher, lecturer, trainer, and entrepreneur. Currently, I am working as a teaching mentor and coach, focusing especially on the well-being of teachers. Teachers who are cared for are also better able to care for their students.
It is important to note that I do not perform all these jobs simultaneously – I do one job at a time. I value diversity and variety in everything I do as it helps me keep my balance. Balance is the keyword I chose for this year and contentment is the feeling I would like to experience more this year.
When I notice the feeling of contentment, I take a moment to enjoy and celebrate. I celebrate it with a happy dance – I can do it almost anywhere and anytime. People often think that we only need to feel and process our negative emotions, but it is just as important to work through our positive emotions. To share my most powerful positive feelings, I also turn to my happiness friends.
When it comes to motivation, I don’t consciously do anything to increase it. Motivation comes from action and this is what I do. It may seem odd, but I am motivated by the feeling of contentment and the moments I feel it. I don’t need piles of money, expensive gadgets, tropical vacations, or expensive clothes to feel this feeling. If these things come with the feeling, that’s great, but these things alone are not what motivates me – they are just a bonus that I get as a result of doing what I want and enjoy, what I feel confident in doing and what I use to create value.
I have increased the number of activities I ‘want to do’ and reduced either the number of activities I ‘have to do’ or the amount of time and energy I put into these activities. In making these choices, I take possible consequences into account from the outset and assume responsibility for them. If you are still in school and reading my words here, I am not telling you to drop out of school, on the contrary, find something beneficial in every task that you have to do and connect them with what you want to do.
A lot of young people are currently dealing with mental health issues – how do you find the strength and joy within yourself that helps you cope with this difficult and lonely period?
I am not a fan of so-called band-aid approaches that work only seemingly or short-term. First, it is important to identify the source of what takes your joy and strength away. To find it, you need to analyse yourself and your behaviour; however, since many of us are not used to doing it, it seems like too daunting a task and people often look for an easier solution. Easier solutions are not difficult to come by, but unfortunately with these people often end up right back where they started.
It is possible to feel lonely in a room full of people. If you want something to change, you need to take the first step. It may seem like an arrogant thought, but if we don’t do it ourselves, we might end up waiting forever. If we do not say or show that we want to dance, we may end up waiting forever for someone to ask us to dance. However, please note that this step towards change does not and should not be a huge one. It is enough if you just find someone who will actually listen to you – you will know who that person is when you meet them.
Many people have taken notice of your extremely positive outlook on life. What are the biggest sources of joy in your life?
This is an interesting observation and a very flattering compliment; I am very glad if people have noticed that. To be honest, at one point I was just tired of all the whining and moaning and complaining that I was experiencing around me and I felt like I was becoming like that as well – and I didn’t like it. With my actions, I decided to change the environment around me and create more of what I wanted to see. It may seem like a pathetic thought in this world of likes and all things flashy, but it really is as simple as that.
Little by little, I started to let go of the need to control others as well as the pressure of achievement. I realised that I can only control and change the things that I am aware of and that belong to me – my words, thoughts, choices, behaviour, and feelings. When it comes to everything else, I can change my attitude.
I would like to take a moment to show my appreciation for the improv group Ruutu10 and their modular learning programme because it was this experience that gave me back the joy of life and helped me let go of my need to be in control as well as my fear of failure. In addition, it helped me discover the magic of being in the moment and improved my performance and problem-solving skills, among other things. Writing this all down, it seems like I’m talking about a wonderland, but perhaps it is one, because I have never experienced something with such a powerful and lasting positive energy anywhere else.
Here are some examples:
Level 1: make it affirmative >> instead of saying ‘no, this is incorrect’, say ‘it is not quite right’ or ‘this would be the correct answer if the question was…’
Level 2: communicate the desired action >> instead of saying ‘don’t yell’, say ‘please speak quietly’
Level 3: replace pronouns >> instead of saying ‘it is a great idea, but…’, say ‘it is a great idea and also…’
How has the emergency situation in Estonia affected your mental health? Do you think it has slowed down your journey of personal growth and development or sped it up instead?
The first wave of the crisis was tough. I had four different roles to play and had to share my home office with a four-year-old ‘colleague’ who loves my attention. I had a choice to make: do I keep my workload the same and deliver lower quality results or do I reduce my workload and maintain quality. I decided to keep going at full speed which ultimately led to burnout as well as anxiety and migraine attacks. But every coin has two sides. Although this period was sudden and unpredictable, I trained myself to make conscious choices, including ones that others didn’t always like…
Nevertheless, I stayed true to myself and made choices depending on what was best for my well-being. I’ve come to realise that while it may be difficult to acknowledge one’s own weakness, the road to recovery is that much faster after the fact. In short, I let people know that I was struggling and needed help – that message alone helped me to recover faster and allowed me to start doing things again.
What are your tips for staying on track and getting over difficult days quickly?
First, it is important to acknowledge that life is like a rollercoaster that has its ups and downs. This too shall pass, as they say, even the good times. You must learn not to be so harsh on yourself and try to enjoy even the bad days. What’s interesting is that on these days it’s as if we’re forced to rest but in our minds it’s a bad thing. Rest is essential for us to have the strength to keep moving forward – it is about variety and balance ????
Interviewed by Mia Britt Williams, Coordinator of the Content Creation and Collaboration Team of the youth information portal Teeviit.
Published in the youth information portal Teeviit in 2021.
